I fired someone for ignoring their work, falsifying the records, and instead driving around all day in the company van playing Pokémon Go. Yes, the van has GPS. Yes, they were aware of this fact.

I should add, they had worked there for nearly 30 years, and transferred to my team. The individual had probably been shirking their duty in this way for their entire career, but the Pokémon Go thing was going on for several years at least. Their previous manager didn’t look into why someone with barely any customers was always so busy.

To be clear to anyone with minds being blown: air is gas and gas is a type of fluid. Water is liquid and liquid is also a type of fluid.

They did, and most of it was implemented then as well.

Mow, mow Power Rangers!

It’s easier to block the sentient skid marks so they only have one another to argue with.

This is why you’ll never be The Onion, Beaverton.

Orthostep 24 inch metal shoe horn.

All homes are disposable.

Now, castles…

Towel warmer.

That is weaponized panic.

At this point, you can no longer trust Amazon to process returns properly. I’ve had three expensive items stuck on Awaiting Return, despite tracking showing it’s been returned, and chat automatically processes the refund once I reach out. Frustrating …

I also enjoy The 1975.

However, I don’t think potatoes and olives would be very good together…unless you add cheese, bacon, sour cream, and chives.

Holy cow, we have the same problem. I only got firstnamelastname@gmail.com so I only get folks with permutations of my first and last name, but to this day I still get my Nigerian counterpart’s bank statements. I’ve got my UK counterpart’s PayPal payments for artwork they did. I’ve had my Australian counterpart’s job recruiters reaching out to me for months. It’s kind of embarrassing when I tell them they have the wrong email…

Using curbside pickup at Chick-fil-A. The line is a mile long, people. I’m in and out in 45 seconds.

Depends on how the Coup part Deux goes.

Winning, or perhaps losing, is existential to Donald Trump. If he loses, he will most certainly have to face down his legal issues.

It’s almost certainly Heinz, and in no permutation you cannot find everywhere else in the world.

Pasta and ketchup is a common meal in Paris according to the one French Netflix show I watched where they ate it and never commented about how absurd it is.

Sounds like an Iron and Wine song.

Women are a good idea for all of us and we will be back in touch with our team members in the Business Sales and Support organization to work from home with the other people in the world.

Too much business up in my predictions.

For equality sake: Men are the best I’ve ever seen in the world ever since I have a wifi and I don’t have sewer in the past few days so I can get a chicken flatbread for the next few days so I’ll have to take it to the store for some reason to make it out of the hood.